In this Part Four I will deal with the many Email and VP responses I have received. It is gratifying to learn of such wide-spread agreement with the basic premise, but in one case I received a sort of rebuttal to that part of the introduction that discussed certain deviant behavior of homosexuals. I will do my best to convince anyone to whom it applies, that I mean no criticism whatsoever to those who practice so-called D/s. The terms "Dom" and "Domme" refer to the dominant partner in such a relationship, for male and female respectively; sometimes called "Master" or "Mistress." "Submissive," or simply "Sub" can apply to the other one or more partners. Generally speaking, I did not mean to criticize these deviants, nor any other, male or female. I admit ignorance in these matters, and only wanted to exclude certain stereotypes from a discussion of "plain vanilla" lesbianism. But the point raised is well taken, and I will share it with you here as best I understand it.
It seems that participants in D/s activity, (whether sex is involved or not), enter into a sort of contract. An agreement as to rules and limits, and which partner will play which role. I learned to my surprise that the roles may even be reversed. I learned also that there are many forms of D/s behavior, and that at least one book was written on the subject...perhaps even more than one. ("Different Loving" by Gloria and Will Brame, and Jon Jacobs) The partners may or may not be the same gender, and may or may not be in love. So to any reader who feels I erred in referring to you in a study of lesbianism, please understand that I was trying to exclude certain lesbians and all males from my definition of what I called "pure lesbianism." I still believe that all women, by nature, are lesbian in the sense that pure lesbianism is a capacity for love that is unique to women. It may be appropriate for me to repeat that while I believe all women carry the "born in" endowment to love that I call the seed, most will express it in ways unrelated to homosexuality, whether practiced by deviant lesbian homosexuals or not. I really wish there was a way to convince readers that my emphasis is on love and not sex.
Regarding other comments received, either in Virtual Places chat rooms where visitors mentioned reading my paper, or by Email, I was happy to find that there is general agreement with what I wrote. I received as many positive comments from so-called straight women as from admitted lesbians, both bi-sexual and not. There were even a few short positive comments from men who agreed that women can love more intensely than men. One woman, a student writing a term paper on the subject of same-sex marriage, asked my permission to refer to my website as a source. (Of course I gave it, but I asked that she qualify it as I did, as not being a scientific study, but rather one person's opinion). Another woman asked for advice in the matter of her unsatisfactory marriages, and whether (and how) she might explore a relationship with a woman. Obviously I backed out of that as politely as I could. I do not consider myself qualified to advise...I only state my opinions.
In summary, I want to thank anyone who read my paper for doing so. I appreciate very much those who took the trouble to write, and those who commented in VP Chat. Several women left short positive comments in my guest book at the site. Thank all of you. In this, and at least one other installment, for December, I will conclude this study. I know it deserves more in-depth attention, especially in the area of "choice," because in many discussions with both men and women, in real life and in chat rooms, I found wide disagreement about what "causes" active lesbianism or homosexuality. I have an opinion on this, which I will discuss in Part Five.
...to be continued
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
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